i can hear the choir
by lydiamaartin
Summary: Outside of McKinley, the stars shine, a world away from New Haven. - Quinn and Puck, home for the holidays.


**disclaimer: **i don't own the characters, and the style is inspired by my friend amy's (amy is rockin) recent fic we were almost a tragedy, which was in turn inspired by greenconverse's pjo fic stockholm.

**warning:** written in six-word lines, second-person, no capitalization, will be au when the episode airs but for now it's just based on the promo and wishful thinking.

**dedicated to:** amy, for the holiday season and because quinn/puck are the otp of all otps :)

* * *

_"home for the holidays," _you smile,  
_"just like we promised" – _together again.

x

thankfully, you know lima won't change  
the lights, the scents, the stars,  
across the town, everything's the same  
the only thing changed is _you_.

yale is something different, bright, exciting  
brand new – the people, the stories,  
even the songs have new rhythms  
you miss lima rarely, never long.

yet yale has no choir room,  
not like the one in mckinley,  
not full of stories, of friends,  
of songs you can't ever forget.

x

your hair continues to grow longer  
but you never wears a ponytail –  
too many memories, too many ghosts  
(you miss the red, the white)

you wonders if they remember you  
is your choir room presence missed?  
the songs you used to sing,  
the people you used to love?

is there a new blond cheerleader  
sitting in your seat, making friends?  
is she in love? suffering heartbreak?  
will she listen to the music?

x

hands still linger on your stomach,  
now flat, as if never rounded  
nobody at yale ever even suspects,  
and you don't volunteer the story.

how is beth doing? and puck?  
last you heard, he's in LA,  
making money, cleaning pools, living life  
and your daughter is almost three.

and now he's here before you,  
smiling, and you fall in love,  
(_"for old time's sake," _he laughs),  
all over again, one more time.

x

he is warmer than you remember,  
and lima is brighter than ever  
and yale is terribly far away,  
a whole different universe – (not yours).

_"missed you, q,"_ he says, smiles,  
and the girl you were once,  
(cheerleading queen, baby on the way)  
is still imprinted in his arms.

_"i missed you, too, you egghead."  
_a private smile, an inside joke,  
remembering the year your lives changed  
and the way you loved, once.

x

the group hug is all memories _–  
_the friendships, the drama, the music,  
breaking up, making out, singing songs,  
and never stopping, not even once.

finn is wearing sweater vests now,  
but the choir room remains unchanged  
all these new faces, new songs,  
new memories for them to make.

you breathe it in, breathe out  
his hand is suddenly in yours  
_(oh, beth, what can i do?)  
_you breathe again, and you run.

x

you miss your ponytail, your uniform,  
the maternity dresses, every single song,  
your pink hair, new york, chicago,  
but mostly you just miss _him_.

the bathroom smells just the same,  
lip gloss, fighting, making friends again  
you close your eyes and smile,  
waiting for him to find you.

he always does, he always will,  
he's puck, you're quinn, _especially now  
_he hugs you, holds you close,  
_the right time, the right girl_.

x

there's so many things to say  
_i miss you, i miss us  
__i'm here because i love you._

all the lies, all the heartbreak,  
left behind in the choir room  
he helps you up, like always,  
you are steady now, with him.

_"hey, let's go to breadstix, yeah?  
__the whole gang will be there."  
_nothing's ever sounded better to you,  
not even the call of connecticut.

x

same stale breadsticks, same laughing friends,  
his hand warm on your knee,  
the feeling of always having family,  
this isn't yale, this is _home_.

then santana says, _"found a boy?"  
_and finn laughs and puck freezes  
and you think the answer's _yes  
_only it's not a yale boy.

_"i've got all my boys here,"  
_you say, and squeeze his hand,  
and his smile lights up lima  
(_there's nobody who deserves it more_.)

x

the choir room is full again  
(they won sectionals by a landslide)  
all together, listening to the memories,  
the solos, the victories, the losses

but this is not your story  
this is _theirs_ – kitty, marley, jake,  
ryder, unique, and all the others  
(all you have is the legacy.)

puck sweeps you in his arms,  
your name light on his lips,  
as if you're both sixteen again  
and _so_ beyond ready for love.

x

outside of mckinley, the stars shine  
a world away from new haven  
he walks you out, alone, together  
you feel like sixteen, like _forever_.

_"i really did miss you, quinn,"  
_and his smile makes you remember  
everything that ever was, never was,  
and always should have been yours

(that night, the test, the tears,  
the fights, the hopes, the losses,  
the hospital room, giving her up,  
_did you love me?_ and _yes_.)

_"it feels lost,"_ you tell him,  
because he'll know what you mean  
and he does, and he laughs,  
_"but i never stopped loving you."_

x

the stars stretch out beyond you  
lima lies behind you, yale ahead  
_oh, once more for the ages,  
_you decide, and you kiss him

you haven't been kissed like this  
since you left lima, last july  
and it was him, always him  
it's always been you and him

you still miss lima only rarely  
but puck, well, you never stopped  
he kisses you, and you smile  
this is home, this is _everything_

x

_hey, quinn, do you remember everything?  
__the songs we used to sing?  
__the people we used to be?  
__do you think you can forget?_

x

you're all home for the holidays,  
(it's like you never even left).

* * *

**a/n:** i hate this show i really do except not really because i keep coming back. if you read this far, please review! i'd really appreciate it, and i want to be full of quick thoughts for the next week!

and **DON'T** favorite without reviewing, please and thank you.

**post-episode update: **words cannot express how much i hate this show.


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